Let’s all take a moment to meet the thirst traps of ‘Australian Ninja Warrior’

The stars of Australian Ninja Warrior are, quite simply, the thirst-trappiest.

Related: Everyone’s drooling over these photos of yoga instructor Patrick Beach

The grueling “sports entertainment competition” pits ridiculously buff athletes against one another, having them compete in impossibly difficult obstacle courses — and doing it all while looking lovingly torn out of the pages of a D.C. Comic.

Let’s take a look at some of the male contestants. But let’s not be even remotely creepy about it.

Ryan Solomon

According to his Instagram, he’s been, uh, “doin’ good shit since ’88.”

Those things include “freeride jetski” and he’s a “fitStop athlete” to boot. (Erm, what is that?)

He’s written as his personal motto:  “You don’t get famous doing pussy shit.”

O…kay. But would you look at him…?

Francis Cullimore

He’s played rugby league for the Junior Kiwis and the NSW Waratahs, on top of being highly successful MMA fighter and a member of the Australian bobsleigh team, and competed in the Sydney Superbodies national bodybuilding competition. The guy gets around.

“If being on the show can help me be more of a role model and ambassador for the next generation of kids to get fit? I’ll take it,” he says. “Nutrition, exercise, mental focus… all comes as a package and will set you or your child’s path to a much healthier and enjoyable lifestyle.”

Oh, totally.

Hi All firstly the response & support I’ve received over the last 24hrs is unbelievable. But what is so great is the amount of parents & kids who are glued to there seats and loving Australian Ninja Warrior, If me being on the show can help me be more of a role model & ambassador for the next generation of kids to get fit? I’ll take it. Educating Nutrition, exercise & mental focus or mindfulness all comes as a package and will set you or your child’s path to a much healthy & enjoyable lifestyle. These kids are already having to adapt to the stress of everyday life just like us, So we as parents play a huge factor in influencing there decisions. it’s unfair for them to see us as parents continually contradicting ourselves, we won’t change simple bad habits or make the right decisions on health & exercise? But expect them to. So be that person and make a change for our tamariki (kids) and let’s get away from the easy options of takeaways, laziness & technology. Go outside and play and have fun together, walk & talk, I promise this will be more rewarding than you could ever imagine. Not only for us as individuals but as a whole (whanau) family. Your kids will thank you for it. Again thanks to everyone that liked, shared viewed ,commented & watch the show, It means the world and will definitely get the right message across. #Ninjawarriorau @franciscullimore

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Scott Evennett

He’s a former Australian Commando — and now he works as a “mindset specialist” and fitness coach.

As for how he keeps in optimal shape, he blithely says: “Using the skills I gained during my years of gymnastics and soccer, together with the principles of bodybuilding and functional training, I have been able to develop strategies to build the ultimate physique.”

The story checks out.

You can see what the show is all about in the trailer below:

h/t: Queerty