These haiku about Grindr hookups will make you laugh… and make you think

Need a distraction from the doom and gloom of our current political landscape? We’ve got just the thing. @grindrhaiku is a new Instagram account dedicated to recording unsatisfying late night encounters with strangers through poetry. Or, as the page describes itself, “hookups in 17 syllables.”

Related: “Haikus on Hotties” 2017 calendar melds poetry with handsome Asian-Americans

In an interview with Buzzfeed, the author, who prefers to remain anonymous, explains how he came up with the idea: “I realized that often my text messages to friends about Grindr hookups took on the form of poetry. These days it’s important to convey your message in a very descriptive way that is also short and to the point. A haiku.”

Related: Here’s Frank Ocean’s Touching ‘Boyfriend’ Poem

The poems range from funny to sad to, yes, even profound. And each one includes a little illustration to go with it.

Read @grindrhaiku‘s work below…

He’s got clothes all on the floor; a real cute mess. I won’t stay past morning.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Dec 24, 2016 at 9:42am PST

You were never mine. He had broken you so bad. And you loved him still.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Jan 26, 2017 at 6:33am PST

Tattoo up his sleeve, secrets and lies too. He’s not who he seems to be.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Dec 24, 2016 at 10:31am PST

That boy is a witch. Casts spells and does tricks. Lifts you, leaves you feeling worse.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Jan 15, 2017 at 3:39am PST

The butt is bubble. The abs are six. The brain is nowhere to be found.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Dec 27, 2016 at 8:22am PST

We use poppers to lose our minds because we aren’t that into it. Us.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Dec 24, 2016 at 9:38am PST

Feeling blue today. You and I were one just once. Ships passing at night.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Jan 12, 2017 at 5:40pm PST

He is in New York. I am in Los Angeles. This will never work.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Jan 11, 2017 at 6:11pm PST

His crack is full of sand. Sex on the beach isn’t easy. But he is.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Dec 29, 2016 at 8:05am PST

We drank sweet white wine, watched Madonna movies, and cuddled ’til morning.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Jan 6, 2017 at 4:34pm PST

Wearing jock straps for recreation in bed does not make you a jock.

A photo posted by grindrhaiku (@grindrhaiku) on Jan 3, 2017 at 1:42pm PST

h/t: Queerty

      

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